Whilst browsing for a lamp shaped like a monkey (as you do) I stumbled across a brilliant page with ideas for alternative Christmas decorations. It was on Amara*, a designer interiors website that I buy home stuff from quite a lot – they do some really interesting brands and quirky little things as well as very posh towels and cutlery sets and chairs and bedding and so on. Anyway, they had called one of the themes on the decorations page Kitschmas. The header image showed a bright, flamingo-strewn scene that was pretty much the polar opposite of what you’d expect at Christmas. Hot pinks and disco glitter and twee woodland animals wearing party hats. Not a tartan bow or red ribbon or frosted bauble in sight.

Even though I feel that the world has reached Peak Flamingo/Cactus/Mermaid/Pineapple, there’s something irresistible about them – they have a certain retro charm. The same sort of appeal as an old, crumbling Route 66 motel or the chintzy little souvenirs you might find in the Florida Keys. At any rate, it’s all very jolly. And so if you’re stuck for decorating ideas this Christmas and want to inject a bit of fun into the proceedings (or perhaps it’s the first time you’ve had Christmas living away from home, in your own place) then take a look at the Kitschmas section here*. I’ve been scouring the internet for non-traditional bits and pieces – glittery cadillacs and pineapple fairy lights and so on – and my finds are below. Sunglasses on, please – it’s like Christmas with Liberace! (And also probably as expensive. Goodness, this level of glitz doesn’t seem to come cheap…)

Fish ornament: Selfridges here* // Mermaid ornament: Selfridges here* // Flamingo ornament: Amara here* // Hundreds and Thousands Bauble: Selfridges here* // Zebra ornament: Accessorize here*

(Accessorize actually have loads of really kitsch and amazing ornaments starting at £5 and they are usually on a 3-for-2 offer – take a look online here*)

Beehive ornament: Liberty here* // Doughnut ornament: Amara here* // Flamingo on a bike: Accessorize here*

Flamingo snow dome: John Lewis here* // Cotton Candy ornament: Amara here* // Cactus ornament: Selfridges here* // Flamingo lights: Amara here* // Deer statue: ASOS here*

Glitter flamingo ornament: Selfridges here* // Gingerbread man ornament: Accessorize here* // Pineapple lights: Amara here* // Ice cream cones ornaments: Amara here*

Ohh Deer have some great kitsch tree ornaments – I particularly like the Raccoon (here) and the Frog Prince (here) but they also have the mandatory flamingoes and some funky little food items. Find those online here.

And although not really in the same sort of vein as the glittery, Miami-style Christmas above, I do rather like these toadstool decorations from IKEA. They are kitsch in a completely different way – the sort of thing you’d find in your granny’s loft along with a Hungry Hippos game from 1987 and a load of Jackie magazines. You can find them online here.