1) Sorry to those who saw a post appear about on Friday about my vlog and then suddenly found that it had disappeared; I have total brain fry at the moment and keep pressing “publish” on things that shouldn’t be published yet! A sure sign that Baby AMR is getting close to being ready for his/her grand entrance… I haven’t really accepted the fact that there’s a baby coming along – you’d have thought that nine months would be enough to get used to it, but life has just been so busy! I think it’s time to set up camp on the sofa and read some child-rearing literature. I just have one more move before I can relax – Saffron Walden here I come! (By the way, the vlog is out already on Youtube, but the post about it goes live this evening.)

2) What is it about dog groomers that they have no concept of following instructions? They spend ages asking you what you want and then do the exact opposite! Dexter has been to four different ones, now, and each time I say “don’t touch his face AT ALL, we like him shaggy” and how does he come back? Like some kind of strange alien/lamb hybrid. Psycho lamb. With his eyes all big and exposed and his lovely beard cut off. (I would draw your attention to exhibit one, the photograph above, in which Dexter is pictured in his “before shave” state, and then exhibit two, below, after his “please only take off a tiny amount and DON’T TOUCH HIS FACE” trim.)

And the worst thing is that I’m always too embarrassed to say anything. It was like the time that the woman at the Tesco checkout thought that kiwi fruits were avocados (she had never before seen an avocado) and the whole situation was just so cringe that I couldn’t correct her. Same with the dog grooming: out they trot with Dexter, looking pleased as punch, having absolutely no clue that they have gone as far off piste as is humanly possible. Or maybe they do have a clue and they just do what they want anyway. I dunno. I might learn how to do it myself with a pair of shearers!

If you’d like more casual ramblings and rants then you can follow my pregnancy and life-stuff blog here: The Uphill