Whilst high on cough mixture delirious with flu, I got around to thinking about what I’d take with me if I was going to be stranded on a desert island. In my fantasies, this island has crystal clear waters surrounding the pure, white sands and there’s a rickety shack on the beach hung with white linen curtains that billow in the breeze. The WiFi is speedy, there’s a swim-up bar serving great cocktails and fresh fish ceviche and, at midway up the most prominent palm tree, there’s a cushioned perch for Mr Bear. (Mr Bear has been practising for the desert island era by fighting his monkey – email readers can watch that on Youtube here or website readers at the bottom of this page, if you’re partial to cat videos.)

Of course, in real life I’d get stranded on some Godforsaken stretch of scrub piled up with rotting fish, and I’d contract some kind of tropical fever within the first three minutes and get stung by a jellyfish. I’d use up vital bodily fluids wee-ing on the sting and then finally die of dehydration, eleven minutes after washing up on the shores of the island. Someone would probably then emerge from the mosquito-infested rushes and decide to eat me and put my head on a stake and, adding insult to injury, forget to apply SPF to my hair parting. (I tend to burn easily on my scalp.)

So, then, which beauty products would I take on my trip? Because obviously beauty products would be the most useful things to pack! Who needs emergency water purifying tablets when they’ve got a beautifully scented facial cleansing balm? What use is a penknife if one has dry, flaky skin?

I’ve limited myself to ten products and it wasn’t easy, let me tell you. I’d quite like to do some more specific Top 10 lists, though – Top 10 Foundations, for example, or Top 10 Day Creams for Dry Skin. That kind of thing. What do you think? I could make a whole new website section for them so that they’re easy to find and reference – let me know if this is something you’d find useful.

The link to the Desert Island list is below – it’s a permanent information page so it won’t publish in the same way as a post. Sorry to give you an extra click to do! You also can’t leave comments on an information page, so leave them here if you have any questions. But please no questions like “but why wasn’t such and such included?” or “so don’t you like X moisturiser any more?” I’ll repeat: I made myself choose TEN items. Ten. There are loads of things that I couldn’t include – it doesn’t mean I don’t love them anymore, it just means I couldn’t fit them in. Enjoy!

Ruth’s Desert Island Beauty List