An oft’ asked question is: “how do you go about hair removal for bikini or lingerie shoots?”

This is quite a good question because I usually only know about lingerie jobs at very short notice and so my hair removal methods are chosen accordingly. I can categorically say that I have never ever had a wax – either at home or professionally – and have never used any method other than shaving and hair removal cream. You may find this hard to believe, but let me remind you that I have also never drunk a single cup of tea or coffee. Apart from ‘erbal teas. Please don’t take this to mean that I am naive in all aspects of adult life or you’ll get a pretty skewed idea of my personality!

Any-hoo, back to hair removal and my reasons for shaving and ‘Veeting’ or ‘Immacing’:

1) Convenience. I don’t need to book an appointment to shave my own legs or slather foul-smelling cream around my nether regions – I can do it all in the privacy of my own home! No notice need be given, and apart from Veet making your bathroom smell like rotten eggs, there’s no real fuss.

2) I’m not particularly hairy. Perhaps if I was more hairy I’d need the professional wax, but as it stands I shave my legs about once a fortnight and my armpits once or twice a week. I don’t have one of those Seventies’ exploding bush-typed bikini lines, either, which is lucky. Although I often feel a bit inadequate.

3) Did I say armpits? How common! I meant underarms.

4) Pain. I’m not into pain, and the idea of having hot wax dripped into my danger-zone and ripped off with strips of what looks like the Turin Shroud does not float my boat. Neither does being shot at with an electric probe or laser beam, or being plucked at.

5) Unless I’m giving birth, which I’m not, I don’t particularly want a stranger peering down at my Bermuda Triangle and then regaling full intimate details to their friends over a Pinot Grigio in Happy Hour. Medical personnel I can cope with – it’s a necessity and one just looks at the ceiling…but Shirley from Bald Beavers Beauty Bar? No thanks!

So there – my reasons are set out for all to see. You might think them ridiculous, but so be it – I get on very well with my razor and my tube of cream with the annoying plastic spatula, thanks very much! I shall be delving (if that’s the right word) more deeply into my hair removal methods in separate posts, so you can look forward to reading those over breakfast! For now, I hope that I’ve answered one of my most Frequently Asked Questions in a sensible and mature way.