This week’s Friday Flash Review – the review in which I say whatever comes into my head – is all about Dior’s DiorShow 360. A mascara with an engine.

“OK, not an engine. I just thought I’d wake you up a bit. It’s a mascara with a rotating brush that is supposed to..I have no idea what it’s supposed to do, actually. Without doing some research (not allowed on Friday Flash!) I can’t tell you even one little word of sales-spiel on this particular item. I’ll make it up.

Item number 4352, ladies and gentleman, is a new generation of mascara that promises to lift, separate and curl the lashes. [How am I doing so far?] A supersonic motor that has been in development for over five-thousand years powers a wand that has been infused with mineral powers to help lashes grow and reproduce. [Hahaha….] We have gone one step further with our revolutionary mascara formula; it is a precious black oil extracted from three-thousand feet underneath the Goobi-Gojiberry Sea. The ancient Goobers used to coat their hair in this oil, and their hair was so long that they used to wrap it around the earth to stop it from freezing over. When the Goobers finally died out, the Ice Age began.

Sorry! Went slightly off-piste there! I’m sure Dior say nothing of the sort – I can imagine that the wand is intended to facilitate the even application of the mascara. Anyway…. On with the testing!

Crikey! That’s a bit close-up isn’t it? That, my friends, is a tiny still taken from a little video I made last week when I was messing about with makeup. It’s in HD – I’ve reduced the size of the image by about 90% and you can STILL see every little pore! Amazing… Not, however, as amazing as my mascara application. On the right, you’ll see the ‘manual application’ of DiorShow 360 – how I have managed to get quite so much product on my lid is beyond me. The eye to the left was done with the wand-engine switched on.

Interestingly, at first glance the left eye looks neater than the right. It looks kind of perfect, and the right eye looks bitty. But if you observe the situation more closely, you’ll see that the lashes to the left are rather clumped together. Yes the lashes look full and very thick, but is there perhaps a little too much product there? The lashes on the right are separated and non-clumpy and that was because I wiggled the wand about and made sure that every lash was coated and separated.

Hmmm. What do we think? Left or right? Engine on or hand-power? This was just one quick coat, but I get the feeling that a second coat on the left eye could be disastrous! The rotating wand does make it easier to get the product right down into the lash-line, but I think that the way the brush turns almost forces the lashes together as they are coated.

I shall have to experiment more extensively with the 360 – I can’t decide whether or not it’s a useful addition to the makeup bag or it’s just a very expensive mascara with a Christmas-Cracker-Toy motor in the lid. The jury is out!”

DiorShow 360 is £28.50 from counters nationwide or Escentual online: http://tinyurl.com/4yspvch