Here goes with today’s (barely awake yet) ramble!

“Wooooo! It’s Friday! Not that that means so much to me, being self-employed. Every day could potentially be Friday really.

Well that killed off any possible sense of joy/excitement/happiness.

It’s a beautiful sunny day outside and I have to leave for my shoot in…nine minutes. Can I do a Friday Flash Review in nine minutes? Will it have typos? Will I accidentally type a horrific swear-word that will make you all choke on your toast? Who knows? Why am I wasting good seconds of my nine minute window rambling on about rubbish?

Today’s item in question: the Blistex Lip Massage.

What’s this then? A small plastic tube that – from the outisde, at least – looks like a standard lip balm. Chapstick stylee. Lift off the lid, however, and things get fruity; there’s no stick of balm poking out here, just a rubber ‘nib’ with ridges on it! How bizarre. Let’s give it a rub up and down on my lips. That feels weird..

Right. You turn the bottom about ten gazillion times and a bit of balm comes out of the hole in the middle of the nib-thing. That makes more sense. Mmm, nice balm – I can’t describe the flavour to you because I’m useless at that, but I can tell you that it feels nice and mosturising and slightly tingly.

The tingly aspect is heightened by the fact I’m rubbing the balm on with this ridgey nub (!) which is quite a nice sensation. It’s like rubbing the sole of a new shoe over your mouth. Or something. [Can I point out that I have never actually carried out the aforementioned act.] A miniature trainer (or sneaker!) sole. Is this gimmicky, or is it good? I, for one, rather like it. I’m not sure that it’s removing any lip-debris, or sloughing away any dead skin cells, but it’s certainly increasing blood flow to the area. My lips look a little bit plumped-up. I’m sure that this will be a temporary effect, but it’s a welcome one!

Slightly concerned about the build-up of gunk that’s left in between the ridges in the sole of the miniature sneaker-shoe. There seems to be a definite (ugh) skin/balm/dirt presence. It doesn’t bother me so much that I wouldn’t use the Lip Massage again, but it’s a potential ongoing issue. Quick wipe with a tissue (issue, tissue, I’m poetic this wonderful morning) and the nib/nub/fairy’s trainer is clean and dry.

The Lip Massage balm itself contains Shea Butter to soften and condition skin, Aloe Vera to soothe and Squalene (never heard of that one!) to soften and protect. I really like it. The ‘massage’ tip could be considered to be a bit pointless, but I say, on this sunny Friday, that in this case ‘more is more’. Why not have a rubber massage tip? Why not have a bit of fun whilst you apply your balm? This Lip Massage thingy is £1.83 from Boots, for God’s sake – £1.83! That’s probably less than it costs me to put Sisley mascara on one lash, so I’m certainly not going to begrudge Blistex their little gadgety massage contraption. I shall be using this on a daily basis and I’ll let you know if there are any long-term additional benefits. Perhaps I’ll have lips like Angelina Jolie by next week!”

Are you still there everyone? That went on a bit didn’t it? About six minutes too long actually, because now I’m very, very late. Have a happy, sunny Friday!