It’s life update time again, and rather than bore you with all of the tantrums and CIA-level negotiation we’ve been having to do around here, with our three and a four year old, I thought we could talk about bedtime routines and (more specifically) some of the crazy things I’ve done to get the kids…
Well, life is hurtling along and Baby One (four and a half years old) asks for “quiet time” so that she can “write her thoughts in her diary” and Baby Number Two (three today!) has started sleeping in a big boy bed. Now listen; some of you might be thinking that three is a little…
I’ve had a slightly longer break from work than anticipated; but don’t worry, there’s nothing sinister afoot. I’m not ill, the dog didn’t die, I’ve not had a drastic facelift that meant I needed to hide behind bandages for a month. I was just absolutely shattered before Christmas and then the school holidays (aka “the…
I made my first school-related Mum Error the other day when I sent Angelica wearing her uniform on something called a “mufti day”. What the hell is mufti day? Granted, I should have probably Googled it instead of dismissing the mufti-themed email – thinking I have no clue what this means and then deleting it from my…
Life update time – I know how keenly you all look forward to my inane twaddle about domestic affairs. I feel as though this is almost a bonus ball, too, because last week you had a rant about pumpkins which was a life update in itself. Or at least an update into my (unhinged?) state…
Ted Talks! As in, he’s properly stringing together sentences and chattering away, which means we’re at that very weird turning point where you begin to forget that your child was ever a gurgling baby. (Sorry if you thought I was about to announce a Ted Talk coup; not happening. I don’t know what an earth I’d…
After what feels like a two year-long labour birthing an oversized porcupine, my app has finally launched. It has been a something of a trying time and I fear I may have turned into what’s known as a shouty person, but The Night Feed is here at last and I’m so proud of it. A sanctuary…
A bonus life update, this month, because I promised to tell you how it went with Angelica’s first day at school. Whether I cried, whether I fell to my knees sobbing and tried to hold on to her feet as she walked into the classroom… As a matter of fact, I didn’t cry at all,…
Angelica starts school tomorrow, but I tell you what feels most weird about today, which is officially known as First Day Of School Eve: the fact that I’m not writing my monthly update in a panic at ten minutes to midnight! Yes that’s right, my friends, I’m actually writing this in daylight – everyone is up and…
I’ve just been away for four days and I didn’t do any work at all! Four whole days without my laptop! Taking childbirth out of the equation (and those necessary, blurry months either side) I haven’t spent that much time entirely work-free since I went to Florida for the New Year which was in – please…
Oh, the shame, the shame: for the first time ever I’m having to postpone my life update and not do it on exactly the right day. (Third of the month.) I’m hoping that the heavens won’t fall in or that we won’t be sent a plague of poisonous frogs, because I’m very superstitious about my life updates…
A fleeting break from tradition with this life update because I’m going to be talking mostly about me. My favourite subject. (Joke: I hate talking about myself unless I’ve had too much wine. In fact, I tend to stop people in their tracks when they try to ask me what I do for a living…
I always have such good intentions for this monthly life update post (in fact even writing the first part of this sentence seems very deja vu), but however hard I try to do things in advance I always end up compiling it at the nth hour on the 3rd day of the month. (It has…
This could be interesting; I’ve given myself forty-five minutes to write my monthly life update and I’m writing it, perhaps unwisely, from bed. Because it’s bloody freezing isn’t it? And we have now entered the month of May, which means that it is now illegal to turn the heating on. In this house, anyway. So…
Here’s Angelica waiting patiently for her nails to dry (kids’ polish) whilst watching Teletubbies on the iPad. My heart can’t take it, she’s so tiny, yet so grown up – imagine what emotional turmoil I’m going to be in when she hits her teens! She’s only three, so basically I have another ten years of this sort…
Ted is two today, which means that I must have entered some sort of space-time vortex since giving birth to him because I can genuinely say, without a hint of over-exaggeration, that it seems like only last month when I bought him home from the hospital. I can still remember the argument that was happening…
Happy New Year everyone! I wasn’t supposed to be back at work until at least the 7th January (preferably the 14th) but then I remembered that my life update goes out on the third of every month and my superstitious nature won’t let me bend the rules and postpone it. So here I am, popping…
Angelica: started pre-school in September and has aged by around eight years in just three months. I’ve never seen anything like it. I dropped her off a fine-haired, slightly apprehensive baby, and now she comes back home with all the sass of a teenager after a party-fuelled gap year in Bali. “Erm, Mummy, you haven’t…