There’s a feud brewing. At least, the papers and online media are trying to get a feud brewing. They’re stoking the fires with as many twigs of nonsense as they can, and obviously I had to stick my oar in. I was asked by the Express to comment on Kate Middleton’s eye makeup – you know, the age-old, slightly mundane ‘black kohl around the eye’ type of look. Now, let’s get something straight. I wear this look. Not a lot – normally there’ll be a little smudgey-fudgey going on with a neutral eyeshadow around the edge, or there’ll be a flick, or something. But still – I can’t really see what’s so wrong with her dashing a bit of black liner around her eyes before she hops out of the door.

True, it may not be the most flattering look for her – perhaps a soft, taupe, smoky eye would look amazing? – but she doesn’t look ‘hard’, as Dame Vivienne labelled her. Anyway – I always feel a bit sorry for people who are being slated, so I barged in their with my words of…er…support and wisdom. Thanks Kate – you can give me that tenner next time you see me! (Hahahaha….)

You can read the full Vivienne Westwood vs. (as yet silent-on-the-matter-Kate) here: EXPRESS KATE MIDDLETON