I have to be honest here and say that the “Autumn” collections are always my least favourite. It’s always the same old blah blah blah, dark lipsticks and eyeshadows in varying shades of “leaves turning orange, then brown, then falling from the tree as the sun sets over the mountains.” Give me strength.

I actually love those kinds of eyeshadow shades, but the lips? Not so much. Plum, burgundy and russet red are not colours that I would ever reach for given a choice. Perhaps it’s because I’m blonde, or maybe it’s because I’m extremely lazy and applying dark colour takes a little bit of thought and preparation!

Anyway, this autumn I thought I’d make a bit of effort and actually try some of the lipstick samples in dark and daring colours. I’ll admit that it was when I was grossly hungover, so there was little else to do that meant I could stay in one position, in my office chair wearing nothing but my pants and a vest top. (You know you wanted that information. It makes the photos so much more interesting, surely?)

Photo number one shows me wearing Lancome’s L’Absolu Mat Cashmere in Magie Poupre. What an amazing, amazing texture of lip colour! Is it a gloss? No, because it’s the opposite – matt. But it applies like a gloss, it’s liquidy like a gloss. The staying powder is immense, though, and the finish is absolutely smooth. It reminds me a bit (a lot) of YSL’s Rouge Pur Couture, except that there’s no shine and you only need one coat.

L’Absolu Mat Cashmere, Shade 300, is £21 with free delivery from FeelUnique

(Lancome also have a lipstick for autumn in a dark purple shade. Surprisingly wearable for a brunette but makes me look like a vampire. It’s called Prune Mantille and it’s also £21 at FeelUnique)

Picture number two shows me looking very vampy in two Estée Lauder autumn lip products. I’ve layered Black Cassis (from the Violet Underground collection) with the Chaotic Currant gloss. Both lovely, but the gloss is quite sheer which can make it look a bit odd if you don’t apply it evenly. If it shifts around on your lips then you can really tell – I think it works better as a glossy topcoat for the lipstick. If you want a properly deep reddish-purple then the lipstick is fab – a beautiful texture. Like many dark shades, it can cling to the dry areas of your lips, though, so make sure you’ve buffed off any dry skin bits before you use it! The lipstick is £19.50 from counters nationwide and Selfridges online, and the gloss is £17.

Photo three is Guerlain’s utterly beautiful Rouge l’Extrait in shade M27, Luxure. You can see the full review here, and it costs £26.55 with free delivery at Escentual.com

What do you reckon to these strong, darker shades? I think that they look great, but they’re not the kind of colours that a blonde like me could just slap on and go. They tend to make my eyes disappear and so a little more attention to the eye makeup is needed. I also think that skin needs to look perfect when the lips are so strong. Thank goodness for Dior who have a more neutral offering for autumn – it’s still quite fizzy and autumnal, but it’s closer to my comfort zone!

“Wild” (shade 646) is very sheer, so the final effect is a lot lighter than you’d think. It’s almost a nude, really, a nude with a shimmery, gingery tint to it. Gingery? I think I mean peachy! Do I? Orangey. I’m so sick of looking at lipstick colours now, I’m going to have to stop. “Wild” costs £24 from Escentual.com